With an experimental and maxed-out sound, bold new MCs are emerging from all corners of the UK – and with US rap in the doldrums, the time is ripe for another British Invasion

It’s early November and London’s Electric Ballroom is heaving. The warm-up DJ drops Fetty Wap’s 2014 smash Trap Queen, and the young crowd, a fair portion of whom were in primary school when the tune first came out, roar every word. They’re clad in baggy skatewear, with distressed, monochromatic union jacks plastered across hats and jackets. A coat sails across the room: someone is going home chilly tonight, but that’ll be the last thing on their mind as Liverpool rapper EsDeeKid, one of the fastest-rising musicians in the world, explodes on to the stage.

Wrapped in a hooded cloak and spinning like a twig in a hurricane, he grabs the mic and snarls: “Are you ready for rebellion?”, his distinctive scouse accent battling a storm of apocalyptic bass and John Carpenter-esque horror synths. Behind him, projections flash in stark black and red – tower blocks, eyeballs, dot-matrix geometries – more like the ragged photocopy aesthetic of 80s post-punk than any luxury rap branding. The teenagers in the room are ecstatic, borne aloft by the palpable sense, thrumming from stage to pit, that this is A Moment.

These events are meant to make Christmas magical, and while many do, a few fall spectacularly short. Here, in no particular order, are some of the worst offenders

It’s the most wonderful time of the year: the season where British people traditionally complain about spending too much on rip-off Christmas events. This year’s festivities have already kicked off in earnest, thanks to the malfunctioning Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer drone show in Haywards Heath this week. By all accounts the drone show was a classic of the genre. It made big promises, offering families “a night of magic and wonder” complete with “state of the art production [and] 600 LED drones”. Then it charged big money, with some families paying hundreds of pounds to attend. And then, of course, it comprehensively underdelivered.

Reports describe the event as not only being too short – about just 15 minutes – but also, due to the failure of several drones, completely unintelligible. “From the beginning, large numbers of drones were missing, which left huge gaps in the formations and made it nearly impossible to understand what the images were even supposed to represent!” wrote one aggrieved attendee on social media. “The ‘finale’, the moment the entire audience was waiting for, didn’t even happen. Just a black sky.”

I knew that a revolution in our understanding of soil could change the world. Then came a eureka moment – and the birth of the Earth Rover Program

• Report: Experts say seismic waves can check soil health and boost yields

It felt like walking up a mountain during a temperature inversion. You struggle through fog so dense you can scarcely see where you’re going. Suddenly, you break through the top of the cloud, and the world is laid out before you. It was that rare and remarkable thing: a eureka moment.

For the past three years, I’d been struggling with a big and frustrating problem. In researching my book Regenesis, I’d been working closely with Iain Tolhurst (Tolly), a pioneering farmer who had pulled off something extraordinary. Almost everywhere, high-yield farming means major environmental harm, due to the amount of fertiliser, pesticides and (sometimes) irrigation water and deep ploughing required. Most farms with apparently small environmental impacts produce low yields. This, in reality, means high impacts, as more land is needed to produce a given amount of food. But Tolly has found the holy grail of agriculture: high and rising yields with minimal environmental harm.

George Monbiot is a Guardian columnist

The hobbyists who helped build this site created technology that has been used to humiliate countless women. Why didn’t governments step in and stop them?

For Patrizia Schlosser, it started with an apologetic call from a colleague. “I’m sorry but I found this. Are you aware of it?” He sent over a link, which took her to a site called Mr DeepFakes. There, she found fake images of herself, naked, squatting, chained, performing sex acts with various animals. They were tagged “Patrizia Schlosser sluty FUNK whore” (sic).

“They were very graphic, very humiliating,” says Schlosser, a German journalist for Norddeutscher Rundfunk (NDR) and Funk. “They were also very badly done, which made it easier to distance myself, and tell myself they were obviously fake. But it was very disturbing to imagine somebody somewhere spending hours on the internet searching for pictures of me, putting all this together.”

My husband and I were unable to have children, and then we heard about a new experimental technique

I was 26 when my gynaecologist told me that my fallopian tubes were blocked and there would be no way I could get pregnant. I was devastated. I had always wanted children. It was 1972; I was living in Bishopbriggs, near Glasgow, and working as a college lecturer. IVF didn’t exist, and when my husband and I put our names down to adopt a baby, we were told we had very little chance because few babies were available to adopt at the time. Meanwhile, my gynaecologist tried to open my fallopian tubes. It didn’t work.

I refused to accept that I had no options. I read every article I could about fertility treatment. After three years, I heard about a medical breakthrough by gynaecologist Patrick Steptoe and physiologist Robert Edwards. It was described as very experimental and new.

Australian eco community is a sanctuary for native animals and a showcase of sustainable living

Bill Smart has never heard the word “solarpunk”. But the softly spoken 77-year-old lights up when given the definition from Wikipedia: a literary, artistic and social movement that envisions and works towards actualising a sustainable future interconnected with nature and community.

Solar refers not just to renewable energy but to an optimistic, anti-dystopian vision of the future. Punk is an allusion to its countercultural, do-it-yourself ethic.

Exclusive: Group’s open letter says Reform UK leader must take responsibility for behaviour as a schoolboy

A group of Holocaust survivors have demanded Nigel Farage tell the truth and apologise for the antisemitic comments that fellow pupils of Dulwich College allege he made toward Jewish pupils.

The Reform UK leader has said he never racially abused anyone with intent but may have engaged in “banter in a playground”.

Tourists all out for 334 with Root unbeaten on 138
Ashes top 100 | Get the Spin newsletter | Email Rob

75th over: England 329-9 (Root 137, Archer 34) In his second Test, Doggett was ineffective yesterday, finishing with 0-74. He starts today with a short ball. Root pulls it but finds a fielder. He steers the second one behind square for a single. Jofra Archer adds another run to his highest Test score, swatting another short one. The easy runs for England continue as Root swipes to fine leg. Archer does likewise, ducking and hooking. Four singles, zero threat.

Here we go. Brendan Doggett will open the attack for Australia and he’ll be bowling to Joe Root on 135.

Putin, on visit to India, says Russia is ready to continue to provide uninterrupted fuel supplies to the country

• Analysis: Putin and Modi to meet amid politically treacherous times for Russia and India

A Kremlin aide has said Russia is encouraged by negotiations with the US over the Ukraine war and is ready for more talks, according to Reuters.

Russia and the United States were making progress in talks over a deal on Ukraine and Moscow was ready to continue working with the current US team, Kremlin aide Yuri Ushakov said.

Ireland, Spain, Slovenia and the Netherlands pull out after decision not to hold vote on Israel’s participation

Ireland, Spain, Slovenia and the Netherlands will boycott next year’s Eurovision after Israel was given the all-clear to compete in the 2026 song contest despite calls by several participating broadcasters for its exclusion over the war in Gaza.

No vote on Israel’s participation was held on Thursday at the general assembly of the European Broadcasting Union (EBU), the body that organises the competition.